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Woman Power, ***Shelly***

  Author:  31368  Category:(Discussion) Created:(11/12/2001 10:24:00 PM)
This post has been Viewed (321 times)

I was on Art Bell's site and I read this email, and I had to laugh. I thought I'd share it with the rest of you ladies. If you'd like the address, message me and I will PM it to you.

***Shelly***



Here is the E-Mail that Art read on the air last week. It comes from Avis Latone (hawkwoman@thegrid.net):

WOMAN POWER As a post menopausal woman I say this...

Take all American women who are within five years of menopause - train us for a few weeks, outfit us with automatic weapons, grenades, gas masks, moisturizer with SPF15, Prozac, hormones, chocolate, and canned tuna - drop us (parachuted, preferably) across the landscape of Afghanistan, and let us do what comes naturally.

Think about it. Our anger quotient alone, even when doing standard stuff like grocery shopping and paying bills, is formidable enough to make even armed men in turbans tremble.

We've had our children, we would gladly suffer or die to protect them and their future. We'd like to get away from our husbands, if they haven't left already. And for those of us who are single, the prospect of finding a good man with whom to share life is about as likely as being struck by lightning. We have nothing to lose.

We've survived the water diet, the protein diet, the carbohydrate diet, and the grapefruit diet in gyms and saunas across America and never lost a pound. We can easily survive months in the hostile terrain of Afghanistan with no food at all!

We've spent years tracking down our husbands or lovers in bars, hardware stores, or sporting events...finding bin Laden in some cave will be no problem.

Uniting all the warring tribes of Afghanistan in a new government? Oh, please ... we've planned the seating arrangements for in-laws and extended families at Thanksgiving dinners for years ... we understand tribal warfare.

Between us, we've divorced enough husbands to know every trick there is for how they hide, launder, or cover up bank accounts and money sources. We know how to find that money and we know how to seize it ... with or without the government's help!

Let us go and fight. The Taliban hates women. Imagine their terror as we crawl like ants with hot-flashes over their godforsaken terrain.

I'm going to write my Congresswoman. You should, too!

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Replies:      
Date: 11/12/2001 10:35:00 PM  From Authorid: 28946    This is the best cutest thing I've heard in a long time! Sounds like some good common sense too!!!  
Date: 11/12/2001 10:37:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 31368    Thanks Penny, when I read it I thought YEAH, I could do that. lol. ***Shelly***  
Date: 11/12/2001 10:40:00 PM  From Authorid: 28946    You know, I can actually imagine if this happened and the Taliban running for their lives with their turbans coming unwrapped as a post menopausal woman having a hot flash and mood swing all at once!!! Of course woman over there have the same symptoms we have except we have had equal rights and attitude for years! LOL! Thanks for the smiles!  
Date: 11/13/2001 4:54:00 AM  From Authorid: 44960    Yo, Osama!!,,,Wanna Try some Amarican PMS!!!!,,,LOL,,,Ms_Priss  
Date: 11/13/2001 11:18:00 AM  From Authorid: 27678    My sister sent me this. LOL. Free Girl  
Date: 11/13/2001 12:19:00 PM  From Authorid: 35273    Ha! That's great! I'm sending it to every woman I know! ~Chandira
Date: 11/13/2001 12:58:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 31368    LOL, thanks everyone, sorry I was gone for so long. This cracks me up every time I read it. ***Shelly***  
Date: 11/13/2001 5:34:00 PM  From Authorid: 39887    I saw this too, I love it! I am ready to sign up, Osama knows not the fury of a woman unless shes going through MENOPAUSE!! Where do I sign up? BUSYBEE  
Date: 11/13/2001 5:41:00 PM  From Authorid: 39887    I also would like to see him make me, the HOT FLASH QUEEN, cover my self entirely in his desert!!! Oh my gosh, that would take all of five minutes for me to murder him!! BUSYBEE  

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