MY FORGETTER!
My forgetter's getting better, But my rememberer is broke To you that may seem funny But, to me, that is no joke
For when I'm "here" I'm wondering If I really should be "there" And, when I try to think it through, I haven't got a prayer!
Oft times I walk into a room, Say "what am I here for?" I wrack my brain, but all in vain! A zero, is my score.
At times I put something away Where it is safe, but, Gee! The person it is safest from Is, generally, me!
When shopping I may see someone, Say "Hi" and have a chat, Then, when the person walks away I ask myself, "who was that?"
Yes, my forgetter's getting better While my rememberer is broke, And it's driving me plumb crazy And that isn't any joke.
CAN YOU RELATE??? Please send this to everyone you know because I DON'T REMEMBER WHO I SENT THIS TO!!!!
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You Might Be A College Student If... - you bring home a doggie bag from Taco Bell.
- a peanut butter and jelly burrito is considered a valid, nutritious breakfast.
- you're always there if the words "free food" are mentioned.
- hitchhiking across America sounds like an "educational experience" (or at least that's what you tell your parents).
- a "rich date" is someone who takes you to the real movies, not just the free ones shown on campus.
- you drag clothes out of your hamper to wear (on a regular basis).
- you rewrite all the clichés and songs you know, because you discover that they fit your dorm room life (or lack thereof).
- you can think of at least 4 different ways to wear your underwear to avoid having to do laundry.
- you think you're rich if you've got a positive checking balance.
- other people drive your car more than you do.
- you can fall asleep ANY time, ANY where.
- you have week-old pizza in your refrigerator, and you contemplate eating it.
- you'd rather eat off a piece of paper than wash your dirty dishes.
- you have a pile of dirty clothes, a pile of once-used but not quite dirty clothes, and a pile of clothes used more than once, but that you could use a couple more times without smelling too bad.......
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The mother was having a hard time getting her son to go to school in the morning.
"Nobody in school likes me," he complained. "The teachers don't like me, the kids don't like me, the superintendent wants to transfer me, the bus drivers hate me, the school board wants me to drop out, and the custodians have it in for me. I don't want to go to school."
"But you have to go to school," countered his mother. "You are healthy, you have a lot to learn, you have something to offer others, you are a leader. And besides.....
you are 45 years old and you are the principal!"
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DOORBELLS
A family had spent the day moving from their farmhouse, into a brand new house in a development nearby.
Very early the next morning, their 3-year-old son ran in to the parent's bedroom to wake them up.
The mother dressed him, and told him to play in the yard.
About 20 minutes later, he came running back. "Mommy, Mommy," he exclaimed, "Everybody has doorbells - and they all work!"
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PERFECTION Perceptive Eager to please Resourceful Fantastic Extremely kind-hearted Cool Terrific Indisputably wonderful Original Natural
You have achieved perfection!
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Two rednecks drove to a gas station in a remote district for a fill-up because they heard about a contest being offered by the patrons of the station, to anybody who purchased a full tank of gas. When they went inside to pay, the man asked the attendant about the contest. The attendant said, "If you win, you're entitled to free SEX," and the man asked how can he enter the contest. The attendant explained, "Well, I'm thinking of a number between 1-10, if you guess it right you win free SEX." So the redneck filled up and asked to play the contest and said, " I Guess 7."
"Sorry I was thinking of 8," replied the attendant.
The next week, the two returned to the same gas station to get gas. When they went inside to pay, one redneck asked the attendant if the contest was still going on. "Sure," replied the attendant. I'm thinking of a number between 1-10, if you guess right, you win free sex. "2," said the redneck. "Sorry, I was thinking of 3," replied the attendant. "Come back soon and try again."
As the two rednecks were walking back to the car, one redneck said to the other, "You know, I'm beginning to think this contest is rigged."
"No way," said the other redneck, "My wife won twice last week."
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I give to you...
a encouraging nudge,
a giggle to share,
a shoulder to lean upon.
I wish for you...
a welcome of hope every morning,
a whisper of joy mid afternoon,
a sunset to inspire before bed.
I pray for you...
a hand to hold,
a warm embrace to remember,
a true love to experience.
May your dreams guide you to success,
Your days be full of friendships and love,
And your life be as fulfilling as you have made mine.
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If Nobody Smiled...
If nobody smiled and nobody cared, and nobody helped us along...
If every moment looked after itself And good things all went to the strong...
If nobody cared at all about you And nobody cared about me,
And we stood alone in the battle of life, what a dreary old world this would be!
Life is sweet because of the friends we have made And the things in common we share,
We want to live on, not because of ourselves But because of the people who care.
It is doing and giving for somebody else On which much of life's splendor depends.
The joy of this world, when you've summed it all up Is found in the making of friends!
================================================================================= The strength of a man isn't seen in the width of his shoulders.
It is seen in the width of his arms that encircle you.
The strength of a man isn't in the deep tone of his voice.
It is in the gentle words he whispers.
The strength of a man isn't how many buddies he has.
It is how good a buddy he is with his kids.
The strength of a man isn't how respected he is at work.
It is how respected he is at home.
The strength of a man isn't in how hard he hits.
It is in how tender he touches.
The strength of a man isn't in the hair on his chest.
It is in his heart that beats within his chest.
The strength of a man isn't how many women he's loved.
It is in his love to one woman.
The strength of a man isn't in the weight he can lift.
It is in the burdens he can understand and overcome.
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