Date: 5/23/2002 7:55:00 PM
From Authorid: 47983
Boot camp? Or is that a little too much. Since the summer is coming it would be good- but maybe it's too intense. Aunt Darlin, I hope all works out good for ya and your family! *huggles*  |
Date: 5/23/2002 7:56:00 PM
From Authorid: 47734
That's a tough one.. I think that all teenagers go through a rebelous phase.. I don't think that you should let your sis in law "pawn" him off on you for more than the summer.. She should take care of her own child..  |
Date: 5/23/2002 7:57:00 PM
From Authorid: 46069
its nice that you want to help with your nephew but he isn't your responsibility....and think of the affect he willhave on your son...my sister did this with our neice and she became violent towards my sisters kids....your nephew will not likely do anything more for you around your house then what he would do at home....i think it is a big pawn off on your sister in laws part ...this decision will affect your whole family...and if something is said that would hurt feelings between you and your nephew or sis in law ...its a sure bet it will slit the family more...i have seen it happen first hand in my family...very simialr situation...good luck!!  |
Date: 5/23/2002 8:01:00 PM
From Authorid: 21435
Hello Daniedarlin. Of course, I'm a total stranger and know nothing more than what I've just read. Soooo, for what it's worth: Take it "one day at a time." Reserve the right to "return to sender" at any time, if things don't work out. I know that sounds rather cold, but by the time a child is 15, they're pretty well set in their ways. Now, I'm not saying that you couldn't turn the boy around. Are you willing to go the distance? Whatever you decide, I wish you the best. Write on....  |
Date: 5/23/2002 8:03:00 PM
From Authorid: 19435
The teen years are trying for many young adults to go through.. perhaps, a break from his mom and siblings might do him some good. Sometimes there is more to a situation than is told..and there just may be some reasons he is venting in the way he is, that doesnt make it right for him to disrespect them in any manner, but it may be an underlying reason for his actions.. Good luck with the situation, I wish you all the best, and I hope things will work out whatever the decision made.  |
Date: 5/23/2002 8:04:00 PM
From Authorid: 5252
well as a 15 year old, almost 16...i have never acted this way. My oldest brother who is now 21 was like this too though. he moved in with my aunt and uncle his senior year, and things got a lot worse. i think it is just a phase though. if you think it'll do him good to get out of the house, then i say go for it!  |
Date: 5/23/2002 8:07:00 PM
From Authorid: 16069
Are you and your nephew pretty close? It sounds to me like you are. Maybe he seems more rspectful to you because you guys actually care about him? I dont know how anybody could want to "get rid" of their own kids! Sounds to me like she has quite a problem. Just take him over the summer, and see how everything works out. That will give you plenty of time to talk to him and see how he feels about all of this. Trust your "gut" instinct on this. This is a very serious decision that you have to make. If he does stay you could get very attached to him, and if his mom wants him back you could end up bitter and heart broken. I will say a prayer for you, and if you ever need to talk, Im here.  |
Date: 5/23/2002 8:17:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 48993
thank you all for you comments i do appreciate them ......Jeset i think my sis in law considers us "boot camp" see she has no spine when it comes to her kids ...... they ( her my hubby and their brother) grew up in a verbally and physically abusive home and they all have issues of how is the right way to discipline their kids.  |
|
Date: 5/23/2002 8:19:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 48993
Cap this is what i was thinking , just for the summer , although if he got here and his side of the story is so bad and sincere that we feel he needs to stay with us , then we will do whatever it takes so he doesnt grow up the way we all did ie: drugs alcohol and seedy things |
|
Date: 5/23/2002 8:21:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 48993
sk8r , i was thinking of how this will effect my family ( me hubby and our 6 yr old son) and they will always be my 1st responsibility , not to mention i dont want bad blood to happen betweeb all of us. ya see my sis in law took in my hubby when he was 15 their father kicked the crap out of him for the last time , so he kind of feels like he owes his sister. |
|
Date: 5/23/2002 8:22:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 48993
thanks kronk , good points and i am still determining if i can go the distance! |
|
Date: 5/23/2002 8:24:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 48993
breezy gal this is what i am hoping , that they all just need a break! |
|
Date: 5/23/2002 8:25:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 48993
hyperchick , girls @ 15 or 16 are wayyy different than boys ! i wasnt outright disrecpectful to my mom either but i resented the heck out of her live in! |
|
Date: 5/23/2002 8:27:00 PM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 48993
love one another she does have a problem , the problem is imo she dropped the ball so to speak on this years ago and now my nephew is old enough to realize this and resent her for it! and yes we all have a pretty good relationship he does respect his uncle ( my hubby ) and myself greatly ! |
|
Date: 5/23/2002 8:28:00 PM
From Authorid: 5252
Danie....true....they are...but i seriously do think that it is a phase. i'm the youngest of four kids, and i've seen it all happen. my oldest bro and sis who's 19 and other bro 17 have hurt my mom a lot. i have seen how much she has gone through, and i have been there for her to cry on my shoulder. i don't want to cause her pain, so i just keep my stuff to myself. my bro's and sis have gotten over how they treated my mom though. they were all around the same age though. |
Date: 5/23/2002 11:47:00 PM
From Authorid: 3321
I think your sister needs to learn a few things about child-rearing. I don't have kids, yes I know I have no room to talk, but I don't think I would be dumping my major responsibilities on others...  |
Date: 5/24/2002 6:23:00 AM
From Authorid: 48577
My nephew was that way. His mom and step father could not control him. So his grandmother stepped up and moved him into her home. She still has problems with him, but not as much as his parents. So it just matters if you want to take on a teenager with problems. Yes all teenagers act out, but with the way you are putting it, this one is acting out a little more. So there maybe a underlying problem that his parents don't know about. I would talk to him, before saying yes.  |
