Thanksgiving Quandaries **Frankenstein   Author:  47699  Category:(Human Interest) Created:(11/27/2002 7:31:00 PM) This post has been Viewed (324 times) I ran across a lovely bird at the grocery store and I was so enchanted, I took her home with me. When I started to stuff her, she protested. Maybe I should have bought her a drink first. I guess that's the least I could have done. Oh, well. Hindsight is twenty/twenty. That's why I'm walking around backwards from now on. Thanksgiving is the only day when it's okay to give someone a 'bird'. It's even better if it's accompanied by some dressing and a pumpkin pie. Have you ever seen a Pilgram in a shoe store? It's pretty funny because it's hard to find black shoes with those huge buckles on them. That really frustates them. It's even harder to find those funky pimp hats that they wear. It's not easy being a Pilgram. Oh, Lord! I think I'm starting to ramble again. I'm like the Energizer bunny. I go on and on and on. I remember the time when those batteries were yet to come out but there were already ads for them. They were so vague and everybody, including me, was wondering what on Earth 'Energizers' were. I figured it must be some sort of time machines or something like that. It turned out to be just some more dull, old batteries. Batteries have been around forever. Don't get me wrong, Energizers are great and they last a really long time but it was nothing like something out of an H.G. Welles novel or anything. Have you ever shot a turkey with a BB gun? You should try it sometime because it's pretty funny. It's best if you hit it on the butt right in the middle of a gobble. Yep, a mid-gobble hit is the best. It will suddenly hop straight up in the air and scream, "Scoot scoot!" Turkeys are pretty funny that way. That's sort of a holiday tradition around here. That has to be better than being baked and laid out on a platter with stuffing in your butt. I think the turkeys that just get shot are the lucky ones. Would you rather have a momentary sting on your rear end or have it baked and stuffed with dressing? Happy Thanksgiving, everybody! You can join Unsolved Mysteries and post your own mysteries or interesting stories for the world to read and respond to Click here Scroll all the way down to read replies. Show all stories by   Author:  47699 ( Click here ) Spring is coming