A man & wife entered a dentist's office. The husband said, "I want a tooth pulled. I don't want gas or Novocain because I'm in a terrible hurry. Just pull the tooth as quickly as possible."
"You're a brave man," said the dentist. "Now, Show me which tooth it is."
The husband turns to his wife and says, "Open your mouth and show the dentist which tooth it is, dear."
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Bought my girlfriend a mood ring the other day.
When she's in a good mood it turns green.
When she's in a bad mood, it leaves a red mark on my forehead.
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A womans husband had passed away and she is talking to her girlfriend."I just don't know what I'm going to do.Frank left me practically nothing."Her girlfriend says,"but I thought he left you $20,000 dollars?"
"Oh he did."said the widow,but then I had all those expenses.There was $6,000 for the funeral,$2,000 obligation to the Church,and $12,000 for the stone."
Her girlfriend replied,"12,000 for the stone, my God how big is it?"
The wife said,"About three carats."
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