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Should I be angry at her?

  Author:  60792  Category:(General Advice) Created:(7/13/2003 4:11:00 PM)
This post has been Viewed (389 times)

Ok I have this friend, I've only known her since February but we've been really great friends since. Well a while back she confided in me that she liked this guy, who I kind of sorta liked at the time but then I didn't but I'm not angry about that lol, because I really like someone else and they liked each other anyway so its a sort of happy ending for everyone. But heres the thing. She's always like "We should do something on someday and yada yada" then that day I call her and ask are we doing something like we planned and she's at his house and won't be home until late and its just like "I forgot so we can't do anything". This isn't the first time she's done this and this time, shes the one suggested we do something tonight when we couldn't Friday because her granny said she couldn't. I mean I love her and all but I don't know am I going to be able to depend on her for anything......well should I say something to her? Like what should I say, I don't want to like yell at her and stuff but I want her to know that that is not cool with me and I won't be walked over like that......or should I even be angry at her? And he's like dependedant on her and shes like he needs to give me some space but everytime I turn around, shes at his house....

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Replies:      
Date: 7/13/2003 4:25:00 PM  From Authorid: 8278    i would say something to her. maybe wait until she suggests something again and say something like "are we actually going to DO something this time?" don't be overly-nasty about it, just let her know that it makes you a little upset when she always cancels your plans. tell her you want to spend time with her and it would be nice if she would stick to it for once.  
Date: 7/13/2003 4:33:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 60792    Thanx Cage, when she comes online tonight she'll be like Hey whats up and then I'll go why do you do that? And she'll be like pardon and then I will go into the whole it upsets me thing. Why do you say you want to do something with me but forget so easily and do something with him.....you must not be eager to spend time with me. Then she'll probably say are you mad about that I'm so sorry and blah blah. No I'm not mad, but Ashley it upsets me. I don't like to be felt like I'm being walked all over. Especially when YOU were the one who set the date and was like is that all right with you and stuff and then when I call you to ask are we still doing something "oh I forgot" Wouldn't it just hurt your feelings a little bit if I made plans with you and you are looking forward to it because there is nothing else to do and we have great fun and then I just pull out and say sorry I can't do that and the only excuse I have is that I was at some guys house.....the same whom you say you need space from but yet everytime I turn around you are with.....wouldn't that hurt your feelings at all? I want to feel like I can depend on you but right now I don't feel that way.......oh and speak of the devil there she is now.....  
Date: 7/13/2003 4:41:00 PM  From Authorid: 15677    be honest and upfront  
Date: 7/13/2003 4:42:00 PM  From Authorid: 8278    lol. well good luck talking to her. just explain that it really hurts your feelings when she "forgets" your plans. tell her it makes you feel like spending time with you isn't even important enough to remember. and she would be better off not even making the plans to begin with. i have learned from experience that guys come and go in your youth...but friends are forever. i hope everything goes well for you.  
Date: 7/13/2003 5:00:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 60792    ok so I didn't fall through with that plan but I still got her down.....we came up with this new movie and stay the night plan and she says sounds like a plan and I said are you sure? Because tonight sounded like a plan too.....so I know that made her feel bad but made me feel good but now I feel bad....ok no I don't haha  
Date: 7/14/2003 8:38:00 AM  From Authorid: 59858    yea, i think you should be honest  

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