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My Mental State.....Pika Carena

  Author:  22275  Category:(Poetry) Created:(7/26/2003 9:44:00 PM)
This post has been Viewed (470 times)

Anger, Pain and torment,
Inflicted upon my soul,
Short tempermant, fear and lonliness,
Comeplete me as a whole,
Don't leave me please don't go,
Is death knocking at my door?
When I awake tomorrow morning,
Will my soul be no more?
Will I be gone forever,
To watch from my transparent soul,
My actions as I live today,
Are so fake they seem stole,
Cuts upon my forearm say,
I'm screaming out for help I need,
When confronted by whom I dont want to know,
They are from a cat I tried to feed,
we all know thats not true...

Still each night i cry to myself,
I abolish my thoughts of security in life,
I know theres a chance I can die any minute,
I just disect my troubles with a carving knife,
Arguing with myself is all I can do,
I scream my pain with fighting curse words,
I'm not killing myself with my deepining cuts,
to me the thought of that is absurd,
I live my life full of anger and hate,
With animosity and no ambition anymore,
Sadly to honestly be able to say this is my lifelong mental state.


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Replies:      
Date: 7/26/2003 9:49:00 PM  From Authorid: 13546    Wow.. powerful, deep, and so painful.. those are the words that first came to me.. I felt a tug at my heart, I know of this, and how it feels.. your words tear a whole, but can also bangage a wound. *hugs* thanks for sharing this with us hon. Love,  
Date: 7/26/2003 10:02:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 22275    Thanks Carissa  
Date: 7/26/2003 10:02:00 PM  From Authorid: 60018    Wow! Pika this is wow I attempted to write something like this a while back about and couldn't get it out. I'm bookmarking this one Love it   
Date: 7/26/2003 10:03:00 PM  ( From Author ) From Authorid: 22275    Thanks Liz...  
Date: 7/27/2003 12:16:00 PM  From Authorid: 56840    Rainbow Angel said it all.. Keep writing..   
Date: 7/30/2003 10:47:00 PM  From Authorid: 23255    have faith, God is with you, kid... let him overtake you... he won't guide you the wrong way...  
Date: 9/7/2003 3:11:00 PM  From Authorid: 42568    This is so sad to read... basically 'cause I've been there before and it took me a long time to get out of that (mental state.) That's what it is though Pika... it's a mental state. Meaning, if you want to get out, all you have to do is change your mind. Read, educate yourself, find out what's bothering you. By growing and analyzing your feelings, you'll get through this. I encourage you to do this because the best psychologist out there for you is INSIDE YOU. There is a world out there around you that is calling for you... waiting for you to become alive and free... but only when you are ready and willing. This is such a beautiful poem... I know it's hard and I know it's painful but that is going to turn you into such an amazing person when you pull through, more than you already are.  

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