Date: 9/20/2003 3:08:00 PM
From Authorid: 35160
i would sit down with ur grandma and let her know that no matter she feels about allan that she must respect the fact that hes there. maybe sit every1 down together and talk about how every1 is feeling. i have been in this situation b4, but with us, no1 would sit and talk, just turned into 1 big fight. so i hope u all have better luck. ;)  |
Date: 9/20/2003 3:09:00 PM
From Authorid: 56293
Well, she can't stay in that living room forever!!! She is just going to have to get passed her differences.  |
Date: 9/20/2003 3:21:00 PM
From Authorid: 40145
I dont want you to think i am mean or anything, but Allen, needs to understand that your grandmother is grieving over her spouse, and maybe try to give her some time to mourn.. It is hard for someone to lose someone that they love.. but ... I don't know their stituation is so I can't really say.. :) good luck.  |
Date: 9/20/2003 3:26:00 PM
From Authorid: 1225
The elderly are the most stubborn, narrow minded people in the world: never give in. If she's living with you and can't handle what that entails, suggest that she find a place of her own. (ps. whatever you do, don't take any family advice from me as I've alienated mast of my relatives already... just need a few more cousins and I might as well stay home with a can of beans for Thanksgiving. *sigh* When will old people learn?)  |
Date: 9/20/2003 3:27:00 PM
From Authorid: 42945
I'm so sorry that you are having to contend with this situation sweetie, but if your Nanna lost her partner not to long ago, Allen has to have some compassion for her and try to understand that whatever she is saying is not necessarily meant to cause this ill feeling....so sad, and with us not knowing what the full extent of the words said to each other, its a little hard to really understand, but whatever way it goes, its not really fair for you or your mother to have to put up with it...I dont want to offend you hun, but I think Allen has to be the one to offer his hand of friendship no matter how he really feels...compassion for Nanna is the key word hun....I hope it is all worked out real soon ...for all your sakes....hugs Gramma  |
Date: 9/20/2003 3:30:00 PM
From Authorid: 40145
Excatly what Zema said!!!:P  |
Date: 9/20/2003 3:41:00 PM
From Authorid: 50193
I've tried to be nice to her; I've even tried to be her friend. She wants nothing of me. She acts like I'm Satan himself. Her gripe is that she feels I'm selfish (which you all know is untrue) and I do nothing around the house (also very untrue). And we didn't have a few words with each other; she had a few words against me. She is very stubborn and the kind of person that is never wrong.  |
Date: 9/20/2003 3:43:00 PM
From Authorid: 38601
wow, i don't know what to say, maybe you should sit down and talk to your grandmother and then have her and Allen talk again, with you there to mediate  |
Date: 9/20/2003 3:51:00 PM
From Authorid: 54570
Hmm ok Gerb you are satan.... second give granny a computer and direct her to this website. Actually the best thing to do is to everybody sit down at the table and eat a batch of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies, a gallon of milk for dunking, maybe you could get granny to bake a twelve layer chocolate cake today and eat it the same as the cookies. Try to make her feel needed no matter where its at. If you have to burn the peas, make here come outta the bedroom and to the kitchen. VG I know its tough but share your toys. Just try not to get in her way. Yes the elderly are stubborn but there are surefire ways to break them. This is one of them.  |
Date: 9/20/2003 3:52:00 PM
From Authorid: 40145
Maybe have Fallin angel or her mother talk to Grandma and try to solve this out. Sometimes Old people are like this. I never went through this before but I understand your frustration...  |
Date: 9/20/2003 6:58:00 PM
From Authorid: 53052
umm why is your BF living in the same home as your grandmother... that is what is making me wonder!! it might be worthwhile to have a sitdown talk with both of them at a table... get it all out and hash it out  |
Date: 9/21/2003 8:25:00 PM
From Authorid: 34487
It's difficult when someone comes into your life unexpectedly. If she isn't going to be staying with you permanently, then your boyfriend needs to try to the things she does or says that bother him and get along. If it's a permanent thing, then some guidelines need to be established within this new family.  |
Date: 9/21/2003 8:26:00 PM
From Authorid: 34487
^^^typo... I meant: then your boyfriend needs to try to IGNORE the things she does or says.  |