Now... you don't think only humans talk to Him, do you?
Dear God, Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar,the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not one named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We dogs love a nice ride! I know every breed cannot have its own model, but it would be easy to rename the Chrysler Eagle the Chrysler Beagle! Also, please tell the German Shepherd across the street to shut up with the howling at the moon.
Dear God, How come people love to smell flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another? Where are their priorities?
Dear God, When we get to Heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it the same old story?
Dear God, If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad dog?
Dear God, Is it true that in Heaven, dining room tables have on-ramps?
Dear God, When we get to the Pearly Gates, do we have to shake hands to get in?
Dear God, We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent IDs, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?
Dear God, Are there dogs on other planets, or are we alone? I have been howling at the moon and stars for a long time, but all I ever hear back is the beagle across the street telling me to shut up.
Dear God, Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?
Dear God, I've always lived at the shelter and I have everything I need. But many of the cats here have names and I don't. Could you give me a name please? It would be good for my self-esteem.
Dear God, The new terrier I live with just peed on the Oriental rug and I have a feeling my family might blame me 'cuz they think I'm jealous of this stupid dog. Since they have no sense of smell, how can I convince them I'm innocent? Does PetsMart sell lie detectors?
Dear God, When my family eats dinner they always bless their food. But they never bless mine. So, I've been wagging my tail extra fast when they fill my bowl. Have you noticed my own blessing?
Dear God, If we come back as humans, is that good or bad?
Dear God, More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.
Alpha-Zero
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