Date: 4/8/2008 6:28:00 AM
From Authorid: 12072
Tell him if he wants his toy he has to earn it. Tell him he has to get his butt in gear working on the house and taking care of those things for his family before he can have it. Or he can start a savings fund until he has the money. Also did he ever use the 4wheelers he had? Is it a status thing, or he just misses riding? If you can afford it, go for it, but if you're going to be stretched for cash, either get a cheap used one or tell him he ha to save up for one.  |
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Date: 4/8/2008 6:30:00 AM
From Authorid: 12072
I also find it irritating he's getting your daughter into this by having her ask you. How old is she? He shouldn't be using the kids against you. If I were you I"d sit down and have a chat with him about a few things. |
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Date: 4/8/2008 6:33:00 AM
From Authorid: 64567
I would say no. When my husband wanted a 700 dollar playstation 3 I told him he could work overtime at work if he wanted one badly enough. Its been a year and we still dont have a playstation 3! Priorities come first. Your right to stand your ground. And I know first hand what you mean about him riding it all day and not getting any house work done! |
Date: 4/8/2008 6:39:00 AM
From Authorid: 56359
I think that the four wheeler has got to wait. I’m sure he’s responsible enough to understand that.  |
Date: 4/8/2008 6:42:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 57995
Becky, yes he rode the ones he had. That is why I don't want him to have on right now. He will be riding all he time, like last summer.  |
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Date: 4/8/2008 6:45:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 57995
Our daughter will be 4 in July |
Date: 4/8/2008 6:59:00 AM
From Authorid: 10245
tell him he can have one when he finishes "the list" as a reward for jobs well done ;o)  |
Date: 4/8/2008 7:09:00 AM
From Authorid: 820
I'd probably focus more on things that NEED to be taken care of and that you already had planned rather than skip out on those and buy a four wheeler. My husband does this to me ALL the time (granted, it's usually over something small like a fishing rod or anything related to fishing/hunting) and all I have to do is let him look at our budget and he see's we can't afford it. That usually gets him to quit asking me about it.   |
Date: 4/8/2008 7:25:00 AM
From Authorid: 62100
I can agree with you that there are responsibilities that come first, especially while you are still buying a house which needs work..however, I find it interesting that you used question "should I *allow*..."- I mean no offense but aren't relationships 50-50 and reciprocal??? Does he have a job in which he helps to support your family?? Would you be offended yourself if he were to ask someone if he should *allow* you to buy something which you wanted?? Like I said..I totally agree with you that it's not a priority, I just find the term you used interesting..  |
Date: 4/8/2008 7:31:00 AM
From Authorid: 40145
well, if it was for me. I would have said no at least for now until the house gets fixed up then you could think about letting him have the 4 wheeler AFTER the house is done. I would have done to my fiance if he did that. because once if you let him have a 4 wheeler, then your house would never be done. its UP to you.  |
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Date: 4/8/2008 7:44:00 AM ( Admin )
I vote no.. Get what you need to have and splerge on smaller things for now. |
Date: 4/8/2008 7:56:00 AM
From Authorid: 4231
I think the responsible thing to do would be to spend the money on something more practical. I don't know, if it were me my family would come first before anything materialistic for sure. I am not assuming he is putting material items before his family, but I am saying that the right decision would be to finish the house lol Have you talked to him about this and explained that you feel the house is more important?  |
Date: 4/8/2008 8:41:00 AM
From Authorid: 12103
Yep I'm with george.  |
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Date: 4/8/2008 8:49:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 57995
Xylanthia- I said allow because it is up to me whether he gets it or not. If it wasn't up to me he would have it already. And this is a big expense. He wants me to agree to him having it. |
Date: 4/8/2008 9:19:00 AM
From Authorid: 53284
So, if you want to get all those things done, make a list. Give the list to your hubby and let him know that when the list is completed then he can get his 4 wheeler.  |
Date: 4/8/2008 9:58:00 AM
From Authorid: 64197
Ummm, NEEDS should come before wants and it sounds like your needs are needing to be met now. Common sense would say to get your needs met first and then when that is done get the 4 wheeler. My husband likes to do the same thing, put wants ahead of needs, so we try to come to an agreement when it is possible. Good luck!  |
Date: 4/8/2008 10:05:00 AM
From Authorid: 4144
do you have 2 kids?! gotta love boys and their toys!  |
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Date: 4/8/2008 10:33:00 AM
From Authorid: 62100
Oh ok...I was just curious... |
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Date: 4/8/2008 11:17:00 AM ( From Author )
From Authorid: 57995
Nope, 3 kids. My son, daughter and husband. LMAO. |
Date: 4/8/2008 11:37:00 AM
From Authorid: 62849
My sister promised by brother-in-law he could have a four-wheeler if he quit smoking. So he quit smoking. Tell your husband if he gets some of the work done over the year, you can get a four-wheeler next spring. That will whip him into shape.  |
Date: 4/8/2008 11:55:00 AM
From Authorid: 26803
And if all of the above does not work, just send him to bed without dinner.  |
Date: 4/8/2008 12:07:00 PM
From Authorid: 28848
if it were me I would want to put all the money I could into my home.  |
Date: 4/8/2008 12:23:00 PM
From Authorid: 14909
Sounds like he needs to get his priorities in order first. I have a solid 81' Monte Carlo with 120k on it that I'd love to tear down and rebuild but I have more important things to do first.  |
Date: 4/8/2008 12:48:00 PM
From Authorid: 63011
I wouldn't let him get a 4 wheeler until all the house stuff is finished. If he gets the 4 wheeler first, you can guarantee the house stuff probably won't ever get done, because he'll be too busy having fun.  |
Date: 4/8/2008 2:59:00 PM
From Authorid: 43015
tell him if he wants the 4-wheeler, then have him finish up all the tasks on your house and if you have the money, then he can get one  |
Date: 4/8/2008 3:30:00 PM
From Authorid: 63077
I don't think it's a matter of "yes" or "no" or whether you should "allow" him to. You're both adults in a lifelong relationship, there needs to be open dialogue. You should let him know what your concerns are and give him a reasonable opportunity to address them, and then come to a conclusion you can both agree on, not "I'm buying one," or "You're not buying one."  |
