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How to lie to the bathroom scale

  Author:  24003  Category:(Humor) Created:(2/19/2001 8:44:00 PM)
This post has been Viewed (708 times)

1. Weigh yourself with clothes on, after dinner ... as well as in the morning, without clothes, before breakfast, because it's nice to see how much weight you've lost overnight.

2. Never weigh yourself with wet hair.

3. When weighing, remove everything, including glasses. In this case, blurred vision is an asset. Don't forget the earrings, these things can weigh at least a pound.

4. Use cheap scales only, never the medical kind, because they are always five pounds off ... to your advantage.

5. Always go to the bathroom first.

6. Stand with arms raised, making pressure on the scale lighter.

7. Don't eat or drink in the morning until AFTER you've weighed in, completely naked, of course.

8. Weigh yourself after a haircut, this is good for at least half a pound of hair (hopefully).

9. Exhale with all your might BEFORE stepping onto the scale (air has to weigh something, right?).

10. Start out with just one foot on the scale, then holding onto the towel rack in front of you, slowly edge your other foot on and slowly let off of the rack. Admittedly, this takes time, but it's worth it. You will weigh at least two pounds less than if you'd stepped on normally.

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Replies:      
Date: 2/19/2001 9:28:00 PM  From Authorid: 20296    these are great pointers:) thanx!!!!LOL  
Date: 2/19/2001 10:12:00 PM  From Authorid: 26203    I have tried all the above lol lol great post thanks for sharing great laugh lol lol love koala  
Date: 2/19/2001 11:05:00 PM    If I lose any more weight, i'll be a skeleton~ -Dude of War (i'm thin)
Date: 2/19/2001 11:16:00 PM  From Authorid: 27398    Specific to those who want to be slim only!-Einlanzer!  
Date: 2/19/2001 11:55:00 PM  From Authorid: 12709    LOL, sadly... I'm familiar with a lot of these!  
Date: 2/20/2001 3:18:00 AM  From Authorid: 27845    lol, this sounds all to familiar! Great post! ~«*¤YourDestiny¤*»  
Date: 2/20/2001 2:00:00 PM  From Authorid: 12020    omg...the crazy thing is that I do weigh myself only if i'm naked, have gone to the bathroom first, & haven't eaten for at least 3 hours.  

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